When we look back on history to tell our children about the lost wonders of civilization that they will never enjoy, we must inevitably include the golden epoch of 1988 to 1999, when a Belgian martial-arts expert would chop a film a year into the world's consciousness, all based on his karate talents and unparalleled ability to do the splits.
Jean-Claude Van Damme may not be the film star he once was, but time has not dulled his flexibility — which he demonstrated today with the release of a brief meditation featuring his trademark move between two moving Volvo semi trucks.
Part of Volvo Trucks' "Crazy Stunts With Our Trucks" promotional campaign, this effort was apparently the first time JCVD had attempted his trademark stretch between two semis moving in reverse — and for those who doubt, Volvo maintains there's no computer-generated trickery or reverse filming underway. (That it demonstrates "Volvo Dynamic Steering" more than the awesomeness of the muscles from Brussels can and will be argued by future generations, but do note that the trailer on the semis stay straight while backing up.)
To pull it off, Volvo commandeered a closed airport in Spain and waited for sunrise. Van Damme, being Van Damme, needed only one take to make it work.
I suppose if you're a trucking fleet manager or a private owner-operator of a semi hauler, seeing Van Damme place his blessing via his killer feet upon a machine might sway a purchase order or two. But this means more to Van Damme-ists; if we're ranking this among the all-time great splits, I'd place it ahead of the Timecop fight scene but behind some of the iconic Bloodsport moments, simply because of its more meditative nature. Its power lies in distilling the essence of Van Damme's talents into one minute of Enya-backed entertainment. Look closely, children, for Van Damme is our Van Gogh of groins.
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